"Er... yes, okay, I suppose I should tell you that if you're trying to reach me I'm not here, and if you're trying to reach me because you want to do something involving pointy bits of metal or otherwise painful objects, I'm never going to be here. So sorry."
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[And Rincewind will get to know Jeff all to intimately during underwear Sundays, and mornings where Jeff's too tired to put on anything before work.]